Could your relationship use a boost? Are you struggling to navigate
the ups and downs of love? You are not alone!
Relationships are a beautiful yet complex and ongoing dance of harmony, disharmony, and repair. Every successful couple faces challenges, but what sets them apart is their commitment to personal awareness and relational growth.
If you’re ready to take your relationship to new heights and be the best partner you can be (or best couple team if signing up as a couple), the Couple’s Paradox course is here to guide you.
Do you want to keep that loving feeling alive and growing? Are you struggling with feelings of disconnection? This course was created to help you move from repair to harmony, with all the tools you need be a great partner, co-creating a great relationship.
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Are you tired of the same old struggles in your relationship? Do you feel stuck as though you’ve hit a wall and can’t move forward? If you’re ready to take your relationship to the next level and become the best version of yourself within it, then the Couple’s Paradox course may be just what you need.
All relationships go through ups and downs, but it’s the ability to skillfully navigate through those cycles of harmony, disharmony, and repair that makes a great relationship.
If you and your partner find yourselves stuck in a perpetual state of disharmony, with little or no progress toward repair, then this program is tailored for you.
While love may have brought you together, sustaining a successful long-term relationship requires more than just romantic feelings!
HERE'S THE TRUTH
"HEALING THE PAST AND EMBRACING A BRIGHTER FUTURE"
Does it sometimes feel like Groundhog Day? If you’re tired of repeating the same ineffective or relationship-damaging patterns in your love life, and this program is your much needed lifeline. It’s time to break free from the frustrating cycle of re-creating self-defeating elements of the past and start creating a future built on a sound foundation of healthy and fulfilling relational habits.
There is not much success in long-term relationships, but there could be. Romantic love and romantic attraction get you together, but that’s just the beginning. You need more to be successful. Love is not all you need.
This program can transform your relational self and your partnership. Imagine being consistently calm and focus, yet empathic in understanding. Imagine not getting sidetracked by resentments or defensiveness, but instead having the presence of mind to make emotionally intelligent choices, choices that benefit both you and your partner, while helping build strong satisfying relationship.
Now imagine both of you having great relational skills and functioning as a great team.
Say goodbye to destructive habits and welcome a new error of friendship, acceptance, and empathic understanding in your relationship.
TELL ME MORE!
“When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.”
— Paulo Coelho
This might be you BEFORE joining the course:
INTRODUCING
The Couples Paradox
This is an ideal program for couples and individuals wanting to be masterful in relational skills, regardless of age, gender, or sexual orientation.
The focus is on assessment-based awareness and systematic and focused practice, helping develop relational habits that stick. You will each learn how to be a rewarding partner who is mindfully aware and relationally responsive.
Want to find your relational superpower? Here you will find all the tools you need.
Comprehensive Modules
Our course is carefully structured with in-depth modules that cover a wide range of essential relationship topics. From effective communication and conflict resolution to fostering intimacy and emotional intelligence, each module is thoughtfully designed to address the key aspects of a successful and fulfilling relationship.
Interactive Worksheets
We understand the importance of practical application, and that’s why we’ve included interactive worksheets with each session. These resources will reinforce your learning and allow you to reflect on your personal experiences, enabling you to build strong relational habits.
Fifteen Relational Assessments
Understanding where you stand in your relationship is crucial for growth. The Couple’s Paradox course includes insightful assessment that will provide you with valuable insights into your relational dynamics this knowledge will serve as a compass, guiding you toward areas that may need nurturing and improvement.
Monthly Relational
Check Up
 You will have access to our one-hundred item Mindful Choices for Couples Self-Assessment, with action planning tools for building powerful positive relational habits.Â
Monthly Wellbeing Check Up
Paying attention to personal well-being is often crucial to being your best in a couple relationship. An emphasis on managing stress, anxiety, and depression, along with cultivating and maintaining healthy behaviors is often missing in couples counseling. You will have access to our one-hundred item Mindful Choices for Well-Being self-assessment, with action planning tools for building powerful well-being habits.
Weekly Group Coaching
Each week throughout the year I host a 90 minute group coaching call during which I respond to relational questions provided by course members. The call is recorded for those unable to attend the live call.
HERE'S WHAT YOU'LL LEARN
Everything You Need to Achieve Your
Relational Goals
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Understanding Challenges to Your Relationship
- Session 1: The Couples Paradox: Why are we so bad at getting what we want the most?
- Session 2: So, what is love anyway, and why do you need it?
- Session 3: Cycles of connection, disconnection, and repair
- Session 4: Blind spots, schemas, and emotional intelligence
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Assessing Yourself as a Relationship Partner
- Session 5: The Mindful Choices for Couples Self-Assessment
- Intention
- Mindful Self-Awareness
- Choices between Stimulus and Response
- Self-Talk
- Listening, Respecting, Accepting, and Validating
- Assertive, Open, and Vulnerable
- Unhooking from Emotional Triggers and Reactivity
- The Dialogue Option
- Mindful Sex
- Love is a Verb
- Session 6: “Habitualizing”—Turn Bad Habits into Good Habits through Mindful Awareness and Neuroplasticity
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Great Choices, Powerful Habits with Mindful Choices Therapy
- Session 7: Choice and Self-Management—The Mindful Choices Therapy Model for
Building a Solid Relationship. - Session 8: Awaken Your Compassionate Mind
- Session 9: The Relationship Challenge—Conflict as an Opportunity for Building your Relationship.
- Session 10: Monthly and Daily Habitualizing Practice for Individuals.
- Session 11: H42—An Advanced Practice for Couples.
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Co-Creating Your Relational Future
- Session 12: Relational Needs: How to Not Lose That Loving Feeling
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Session 13: Action Planning
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Session 14: For Me, For You, For Us; Relationship Visioning
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Session 15: The Road Ahead: Changes, Transitions, and Revitalization
READY TO ACHIEVE YOUR GOAL? CHOOSE YOUR PAYMENT PLAN:
“The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.”Â
– Thomas Merton
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MEET YOUR COACH
Hi, I'm Dr. William C Shearer!
I’m a couples therapist. I have over four decades of training and experience, culminating in a great track record working with couples.
I’ve been a licensed California psychologist for 46 years. I specialize in couples therapy and I’ve helped over two thousand couples tackle tough relationship issues. Over 75% of my work is couples/marriage counseling. My therapist wife Robin and I have written two couples books, and I have taught couples therapy to decades of graduate psychology and MFT students
I also specialize in the treatment of addiction and eating disorders such as anorexia nervosa and bulimia. Additionally, I specialize in treating stress and anxiety disorders such as panic disorder.
I am a wellness consultant and wellness and well-being coach, drawing upon my background in exercise physiology, clinical nutrition, and experience with health psychology. I have been a nutrition professor for over 15 years.
I’ve had a varied career. I started out in New Jersey as a high school United States history teacher until accepting an Air Force commission. I retired as a Lieut. Col. having run a drug and alcohol rehabilitation program and Air Force counseling center.
My psychology doctorate is from the University of Tennessee. My MBA is from Pepperdine University. My MPH (Masters in Public Health) is from Loma Linda University. I also have graduate degrees in education and Health Services Administration.
I’m passionate about helping couples thrive as a team rather than struggle as individuals trying to get what they need from their relationship, feeling frustrated, discouraged, and not understood. I see each couple as a neurobiological interpersonal system. My client is the relationship, “the space between.” and I look for destructive patterns in the relationship. My job is to get the two of you to fully understand the patterns and to work together to build a great relationship. It needs to be the two of you against the pattern instead of against each other, or “Us consciousness,” rather than you and me consciousness. Within your relationship, each of you needs to be working on self-awareness and self-management (emotional self-regulation), and co-regulation, with a focus on bringing the best version of you to the relationship.
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Most people are terrible at doing these things and that's why most relationships don't work. Nearly 50% of marriages don't work. Millions of people who are not formally married, and therefore not part of the 50% statistic, walk away from their relationship. Millions of couples who stay together are unhappy. That translates to about 70% of long-term relationships not working very well. However, my mission is to help people be in the 30% that are successful and happy - and I have a great track record.
Think of me as your relationship coach. My mission is to help you be in the successful 30% and all that is required of you is for you to be willing to work at being more self-aware and better at self-regulation and self-management — remembering love and cultivating “Us consciousness.”.
All I need is for each of you to be motivated and coachable. I can teach you the rest.
This may NOT be for you if:
- You are not interested in personal growth
- You prefer quick fixes over lasting change
- You're not open to communication and vulnerability
- You're not willing to invest time and effort in your relationship
- You believe your relationship is perfect and needs no improvement
- You're looking for a one-size-fits-all solution
- You're not ready to confront and address relationship challenges
- You're not open to feedback or constructive criticism
- You're not committed to implementing change
- You're not in a safe relationship
This is for YOUÂ if:
- You desire a deeper and more meaningful connection with your partner
- You're committed to personal growth and self-improvement
- You want to break free from repetitive relationship challenges
- You're open to self-reflection and introspection
- You're willing to invest time and effort in your relationship
- You're interested in effective communication and conflict resolution
- You value emotional intelligence and empathy
- You believe in continuous learning and growth
- You're eager to create a positive, lasting impact on your relationship
- You're ready to take responsibility for your part in the relationship
Are you motivated to be the best possible version of you in your relationship?
Ideally, both partners will be involved in this program, but you don’t have to be part of a couple. Perhaps you’re alone but want to be in a relationship. Perhaps you’re separated and between relationships. Perhaps you are divorced and want to avoid the same mistakes next time around.. Perhaps you’re moving toward marriage and you want to avoid the mistakes you have seen your parents make.
If you are already in couples counseling, this program is ideal for you. Couples counseling can be stressful and difficult. Often individuals are flooded with strong emotions and easily triggered, defensive, and reactive. This program will help you have less stress and get the most benefit for your time and money by being able to come to the session already doing the work of self-awareness and self-management.
ENROLL NOW!READY TO ACHIEVE YOUR GOAL? CHOOSE YOUR PAYMENT PLAN:
“We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it and nurture it."
